A Real Post! Shocker!
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
I was reading on the DD_Forum list, and when I replied to a post, I thought, Finally! An idea of something to blog about! If you ever have a suggestion on a blog topic, please feel free!
Someone asked about dating and searching for a spanker and feeling safe.
First of all, always listen to your instincts, because sometimes they only give one warning.
But I wasn’t getting that she felt unsafe. I was feeling like she felt vaguely disappointed and uncomfortable with her experience. (But I was just intuiting from an email, I know nothing!)
When dating, particularly when trying to find someone who enjoys your kink, and even more particularly when trying find someone who really gets our world, it’s important to know oneself.
We are all SO different.
In Pretty Women, kissing on the lips is viewed as the most intimate act, only to be saved for true love. For many people, it’s intercourse. For others, maybe something like anal intercourse. For me? It’s spanking.
But it isn’t that for everyone. Some people find the spanking thing to be a big ball of fun. They get together with friends, "play" with it with friends, meet new people with it ... to them, it’s fun. I admire that.
To others, it’s foreplay. Still others, part of sex. Even others, part of dominance and submission. To some, part of BDSM. Others, part of respecting and loving someone else. The luckiest people love all those bits, and are comfortable with everything.
Me? To me, it’s the deepest, most intimate thing in the whole world. I’m in love with that vulnerable place. I love going there. Being stripped down to just me, to the most sensitive part of me, to the most real part of me, is just ... I can’t even put words to it. That place is probably the scariest place to stay, and yet ... if someone’s watching over you, it’s the most wonderful, fulfilling, exhilarating place to be.
Vulnerable is the prettiest word in the English language, to me. It has so much trust and love mixed up with it, you know?
So where does spanking lie on your intimacy gauge? Fun with friends? Or only for the one? Probably somewhere in between? And if spanking isn’t it, what’s the most intimate act for you?
3 Comments:
I'm with you. it is the deepest most intimate thing in the world. I want to go there to be there, that being there with the love of my life holding me is the most special experience i think one could ever have.. .well this one at least!
Carye
By 
Caryagal, at
I feel exactly the same way. :-)
By storynattie, at
For me it's a little different. Spanking is something akin to playing pretend like I did when I was a kid, though more exciting -- and not necessarily in the sexual meaning of the word. It's just so much fun!
Punishment, otoh, is definitely just between me and A. for the very reasons you list. It's a remarkably vulnerable place that's both scary but amazing.
By Natty, at
